When I was in high school, status was everything, I tried to have the best clothes and do the best things, so I would feel like I fit in, like most kids in America, and my family was very generous so it was easy to always have things.  When I met my husband I was exposed to a whole other lifestyle that I didn’t really know existed and then when we moved and both were making really good money, I was caught up in brand labels again.  I would come home to visit and feel out of place with family and friends. I didn’t think twice before mailing checks home to help my grandparents or buying my oldest friends champagne to celebrate when we went out.  Then I had kids, and then I quit my job to be with my kiddos.  Suddenly it wasn’t about me and my husband- I could get my clothes at Walmart and wear sneakers a little too long before buying the next pair.  We could cut costs and eat at home, but the kids.  Like every parent before me, I want them to have it all.  So they take classes and we go on family vacations, they have toys and electronics and bikes and books and magazines and crafts and arts and everything.  If they ask for it, they usually get it.  Yes, I know that’s not good, but as a parent we try to give our kids things in addition to the heaps of love we provide.  I always wanted them to go to private school, because I wanted them to have the best education something I would have only dreamt of when I was younger, but with the debt I’ve accumulated we’ll have to wait a few years and use the public school, which is not bad and is the one I went to.  I’ve discovered that as I get older fitting in and doing and having what everyone else has is not as important as the time we spend as a family.  This past week we have lovely weather and we’ve been outside playing and relaxing a lot and we all enjoyed it.  So as much as I sometimes covet those tv lifestyles of fame or fortune or even when a friend gets a new house or car, I realize it’s not what you have but where your heart is that counts.


About this entry