Grace from a child

I have always had faith.  My father was a beliver and openly shares his thoughts and feelings and my grandmother prayed and read spiritual authors and sent me to the Mennonites house across the street in the summer for Wednesday Bible Group. I didn’t go to church though or Sunday School.  My parents tried VBS one summer and the rather mean and stern nun locked me in the room and I screamed until my uncle heard me and came and got me (he was a few houses down). 

So when I entered 7th grade and my mom announced I needed to go through catechism for two years, I was quite upset.  Yes all my other classmates from school were there, but I didn’t ever really think I needed to go to church for school.  But I did and I became semi-active with things at church- VBS, attending services.  And then as soon as I went to college I stopped going. I would attend midnight mass with my best friend at Christmas and later when I lived overseas I would attend midnight services at Christmas.  But I wasn’t involved or a frequent attender.

Flash forward and bring some children into the family and I am now on several committees, I teach Sunday School and I am a faithful attender.  My children go to Sunday School and are involved in the childrens ministries at church.  My kids love Sunday School.  I love being a teacher.  But my husband is not part of this.  He does not believe in religion.  I pray for him and have debates with him because it makes me sad, that we can’t go on retreats together or worship together or help together at church.  He will attend with us on Christmas and Easter, but is not into it, he doesn’t recieve the message.

It is very challenging, especially when my oldest asks why dad won’t come with to church.  It hurts me to not be able to share this aspect of my life with him.  It hurts me to go to services alone and sit alone and see other couples. When I was in the hospital with pre-eclampsia and waiting for my baby to be born early, I called my grandmother and asked her to call the prayer team at church, because he wouldn’t do it.  I have seen miracles and blessings and answered prayers and he just kind of shrugs it off, the same way he does when I’m reading a magazine and share an article he’s not interested in with him. 

And so I truck on and grow my faith and nurture my childrens’ faith and pray for my spouse.  His heart was moved the other day when my oldest child sat at the table with my neighbor kid and the rest of the family and said let’s pray and then said a cute little prayer thanking God for our food.  I was so happy and I could tell my husband was also.  So I’ll keep on praying.

This was for the moms 30 minute blog challenge each week at


About this entry