Light on the horizon

So the hubs has been doing the budgeting/bill paying for about a month and I can honestly say it’s been some work, but it makes me feel 100% better, because I know he will get things in order, that is his way.  So here’s my notes from the field:

(I’ve been doing this post update every few weeks, in between posts I write my thoughts/struggles each day in note format, this seems the most readable way to do this)
having actual money makes me spend smarter and think about purchases
husband handling the money has taken the burden off of me
feels easier to justify stuff since all my friends now know about the budget
ran out of spending money 8 days before next set
thinking more about each small purchase (my weakness) and semi-small purchases that end up being large purchases
buying more scratch off tickets hoping to get lucky though, since I now have cash
1st 2 weeks down, now on 2nd two weeks.  feeling much better about the whole thing but my husband won’t admit it’s harder than it seems to manage the finances.  I think I am making better choices and less wasteful spending and he even convinced me to lower my amount in my cart at one online store I was buying from, stating $50 was not a small amount of crafts- which he had a point. I am also loving not using my debit card, they really are a pain in terms of just allowing you to spend spend and not really think about how it all adds up, just like a credit card, but with your real actual money
since husband took over, having been thinking much about debt or money, don’t know if that’s good or bad. I trust him and it has been a relief for me to not have to worry all the time, but it is a new challenge for him to figure it all out and do it all, because right now it is still a juggling stage
I went out today and spent $50 on unplanned for clothes and food, so my husband was really mad, he emailed me and then yelled at me and made me feel really bad and then I just cried.  I cried because today I really missed my grandfather in the morning and I just cried because I feel so all alone without my grandparents. I cried because it’s hard to get out of debt and stop spending like normal.  And then my kids felt bad and they comforted me, both of them said he was mean and my little one came over and wiped a tear from my cheek.  My husband and I never fight and I never really cry, so this was an odd thing for the kids, then we had dinner and we all calmed down.
Oh and today I started a new diet.  Back to tracking all my food and exercising, and I am doing it with my husband, since I am tired of being overweight, feeling bad about myself and being unhealthy.

oh and while the diet was doing well, over the weekend and today it kind of slipped, I mean who can eat well at a BBQ and when it’s your kids b-day?

But I also just really put some thought into some pricey beach toys I was going to buy and decided it’s not worth it, there are plenty of beach toys at Walmart for a few dollars!  Yeah I am learning.


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