Done is better than perfect and he’s a gift even if he’s not gifted. These are two things that have helped me get by.
I am a Virgo, I am a perfectionist. I was raised by a grandmother that had a spotless home and didn’t ever let anything not have it’s place. For awhile that was me, with one kid and 2 cats, that was easy and an apartment. Then I added another child, a dog and 2 more cats, to a bigger place and it’s hard to keep it all organized all the time. Now mind you I am organized as far as knowing where I need to be and when I need to be there, I keep detailed to do lists. I have a place for everything, but my kids they aren’t as organized with their rooms and their toys in the main living spaces of the house and that gets to be a lot. I was beating myself up over it, because I am not a fan of cleaning, I mean I can clean, but not anything like my grandmother was. So I started to do think about this, done is better than perfect and yes it is.
My other inspiration has been he’s a gift even if he’s not gifted. This was part of a post from one of my favorite blogs, http://www.gradydoctor.com
I must admit, I am that mom. Maybe not the helicopter mom, but I am the mom who has my child’s life planned out, college, post docterate degree, what sports to play. I really banked on him being super intelligent and gifted. I thought they would call me up in kindergarten and say wow, we’ve never seen a kid this clever let’s call MENSA. I was thinking of grade skipping. Now my son is so smart, he loves math, he loves learning, we read together and he’s started pouring over books, staying up late to read, just like me. I have since learned they don’t put you in gifted classes until third grade and we are not there yet. But I have been harsh. I have come down hard when a friends child did better in swimming or he didn’t make the test in tae kwon do. And I was told about myself and my high standards by my husband and my best friend. After that I stepped back a bit, but part of me felt crippled when I realized he’s not always going to be the best in everything. That no matter how much effort I put into enriching my kids, it only counts that they are happy. I can’t push and expect the word. God gave me these two beautiful gifts and if they are never Nobel prize winners or top notch physicians. They are unique and they were meant for me to be so proud of and love to bits. I also think that as long as I am interested and support them in whatever they do and be there for them, they will succeed in whatever they want, I never had that and I can only imagine where I would be if I had. But I didn’t and I am here in this good life, with these great kids and an amazing husband and incredible friends, and if my kids are never in the gifted program they will always be the greatest gifts God could give me in this lifetime.